Best Use

A date night discussion guide


Husband and wife will enjoy a “progressive meal” together and evaluate how their marriage is developing and achieving its purpose.


Plan a date that involves three locations – one for an appetizer/salad, one for a main course, and one to enjoy dessert or coffee together.  This could be as elaborate as three different restaurants or as simple as three different rooms in the house.

During the Date

Discuss the questions linked to each location below.

LOCATION #1:  Appetizer or Salad

Mankind’s idea of marriage has shifted over the years.  But God’s plan remains the same.  How has the world moved away from God’s view of the purpose of marriage, marital sex, roles within marriage, divorce, etc?

FOR HER:  Share which of the following marital habits you find easier, harder and why.

encourage Ÿ  nag Ÿ respect Ÿ control Ÿ submit Ÿ love Ÿ manipulate Ÿ serve

FOR HIM:  Share which of the following marital habits you find easier, harder and why.

resent Ÿ protect Ÿ ignore Ÿ respect Ÿ lead Ÿ serve Ÿ criticize Ÿ cherish

LOCATION #2:  Main Course

God desires for marriage to be a picture of the Gospel – the loving relationship between Christ and His Church.  How well is your marriage presently modeling the Gospel to one another and to your family and friends?  With 5 as the highest score, each spouse rate how you feel your marriage reflects each of the following qualities. . .

Love and respect                                     5  4  3  2  1

Forgiveness and grace                            5  4  3  2  1

Submission and service                          5  4  3  2  1

Sacrifice and giving                                 5  4  3  2  1

Joy and hope                                           5  4  3  2  1

Humility and selflessness                        5  4  3  2  1

Offer one idea of how you can help improve a low scoring category.

LOCATION #3:  Coffee or Dessert

“If  you want what you’ve never had, you must do what you’ve never done.”  What does this quote mean and how does it apply to marriage?

Pick two ways you want to intentionally grow together in Christ:

  • Pray together at least once a week
  • Memorize a Bible verse together
  • Read through a book of the Bible together
  • Start a marriage Bible study together
  • Listen to a sermon online and talk about it
  • Weekly discuss one thing God is teaching you through His Word
  • Find a place to serve together

Share something you’ve never done but would love to experience together in the future.

© 2011 Inkling Innovations and Chris Sherrod

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